school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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