do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize