Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
