i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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