he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
