She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize