She said her name was "party"
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
