No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I think a kid would responsible me up
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
