im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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