I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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