accomplished twins. life is a go
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
