we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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