He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
