I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
