Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
