she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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