That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Duck Duck Cougar?
thus making me awesome and them whores
are you so shy because you have an std?
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Randomize