i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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