I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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