Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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