just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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