It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
