I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
