32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
