think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
