The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
