hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize