But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Someone signed my nipple.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
