Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
