I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Be still, my beating vagina.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
