only if we run a train.
done.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
