I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
