Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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