so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
