Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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