Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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