She is in my trunk
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
