Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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