I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize