Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
