Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
