Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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