so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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