dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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