Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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