How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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