So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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