yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
