Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I just googled if crying burns calories
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Randomize
