So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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