Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
