oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
