I'm passing your future prison.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
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