i always forget guys have bellybuttons
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
